Thursday, November 19, 2009

Road runnin'

Ya know those days when you are anywhere but in your car? Mentally, I mean. You really ARE in the car but are on autopilot.

I have many days like those. Past and present.

One, when I still lived in the country, I had gone to town to get gas. No biggie. But for some reason gettin' on the On Ramp to get on the highway to get home was for me, a big deal that is. .

I come out of the station, look left to make sure no one is coming. Oh, let me mention, my oldest son is with me. SO HEAVEN FORBID WILL I EVER LIVE THIS DOWN.

I get on the service road to come home. I'm yakkin' away. (For those of you bloggin' friends, I do that a lot. Sometimes I even get told to BREATHE.) So I'm just runnin' my mouth and I realize that I have past the On Ramp MARKINGS. NOT THE ACTUAL ON RAMP, just the MARKINGS, mind you. Just the white outlines of the ramp.

I calmly JERK the car over the whole triangle of city ti-, uh, those little marker thingys that shine at night and are square, that sound like a card in the bike spokes, and get on the highway.

Of course, my oldest, is swearin' he has whiplash from the jerkin' of the car. WHATever.

We get home and he tells everyone, then and now, how I went through the grass median, jumped the curbs to finally get on the highway, all the while slingin' him around like a Raggedy Andy doll. Of course, as he is retellin' this story he is flippin' and floppin' all over like we were off roadin'. Please. I had a Mazda 626. It does NOT off road. It DOES fly. But it DIES when it FLIES.

This all comes to mind because one day this week. I actually missed my exit to come to work. I was following the car in front of me. (NO! I was not tailgating. Promise. I did that when I was younger. Like last year. No really, it's been at least, what, 6 weeks ago, when I did that?)

I missed it so bad, that if I had tried to take it anyway, I would have gone off the overpass, flying like a speed racer, jumpin' all them tractors at a fair. I know from experience that goin' off a road at full speed does not end well.


So I had to take the alternative route. Down the Interstate. Yuk. KrAzY drivers go on the Interstate! They are always causin' accidents! I think some of them actually TRY to jump over cars on the Interstate. There are even some that just jump INTO traffic. (Someone must have taken their Mama waaay too serious when she told them to go play in traffic.)(I used to tell my kids that, they thought it was safer sometimes than dealin' with me.)


In my neck of the woods, we call missin' your exit, takin' the scenic route. So if you want to ride with me, make sure you allow for extra time, cuz ya just never know until the last minute which route we could be takin'.

We fly by the seat of our pants, uh, cars, at my house.

Cheers ya'll!

Kackle any today? Do it! Justa little! It'sa big stress reliever!!




17 comments:

Lee said...

I have gone the completely wrong way because I was just driving along. Once I took my daughter to her old school instead of the new one....

Menopausal New Mom said...

Hi KaLynn, when you get that Camaro, I'll be happy to take the scenic route whenever you want!

Just A Normal Mom said...

I, too, have missed exits and often tell my child to "go play in traffic". Kids never listen : )
-Lela

The Peach Tart said...

I drive kind of the same way myself.

Anonymous said...

Don't let her kid ya, y'all. It did not happen like that. I am the aforementioned oldest son that she took off roading THROUGH THE MEDIAN in the above story. I broke off 16 fingernails hangin' on for dear life! I still have a scar from the seat belt burn! I swear! I never knew you could have a religious experiences and crap your pants in fear all at the same time...

KaLynn ("MiMi") said...

Lee-don't ya just love forgetting where you are going?
Deb-I will gladly come take you for a scenic drive in the Camaro!
Lela-it was so fun telling the kids to play in traffic! they look at you like you have lost your ever loving mind!
Peach-I'm soo glad I am not alone.
Rabbit-liar liar pants on fire! you do not have a scar from THAT experience! It was from the OTHER experience!! =0D

Anonymous said...

It is easy to be distracted, watch out more is all you can do. Remind yourself.

Anonymous said...

I've had days where I drive home and then I think to myself,"Wow, how did I get here? I must have totally been on autopilot the who time'. Those are usually after long stressed fill workdays. I'm a pretty safe driver. - G
PS - I love the family banter between you and your son. Sweet.

KaLynn ("MiMi") said...

Secretia-It is soo easy to just get lost in the road! I try to watch cars, see where they go, just to keep me alert. Then I will realize that I totally missed them getting off the highway!

Georgina-we have a lot of fun! He makes fun of me all the time! You should be around when he does it in person! I laugh til I have tears running down my face alot of times!

Pat said...

Yes, I've been known to miss the exit or on ramp because of day dreaming. What's bad is when it happens when the husband is driving WHILE we're towing the honking trailer AND we have the GPS. Sometimes it's not easy to find a place to turn the darn thing around when it's the size of a semi! LOL!

KaLynn ("MiMi") said...

OH NO PAT! If the turn arounds are like they are out here, you may have to go miles out of your way to find a crossover!! I think that would DEFINITELY be a scenic detour!! =0)

Unknown said...

since i live in a town that has only 2500 people in it and no traffic lights, this is not an issue for me. but i can feel for you...hehehe.

thanks for stopping by and for the info on the purple box. i will have to see if i can find that in this town.

have a wonderful day!

KaLynn ("MiMi") said...

PJ-the actual town I live is has a sign posted that says POP. 2000 and we do have A traffic light. I just work in a larger town about 30 minutes away. Hence all the road blogs.

I've also heard about pillow specially designed to go in the freezer for those flashes of heat at night.

http://howtobecomeacatladywithoutthecats.blogspot.com said...

Damn backseat kid drivers! I'm usually on autopilot when I'm driving... scary, but true. I have to be especially careful when I deviate from my usual destination, so I don't end up in the wrong place!

KaLynn ("MiMi") said...

CLL-don't ya just love going the same route to get somewhere besides work and end up at work anyway? I was going to my son's one day and missed the turn because I was on that dang ole autopilot! took me 2 miles outta the way!

Unknown said...

I am following you now and wanted to say thanks for following me!!

I drive on autopilot a lot and need to work on that. Just yesterday I missed my exit.oops!!

KaLynn ("MiMi") said...

Erin-It was so froggy this morning that I missed my exit again! I was so concentrating on seeing the road that I totally missed the exit! Then when I got to town almost ran over a runner that was running in the middle of the road instead of on the sidewalk, wearing black pants, dark purple shirt and a black hat! It was 6:30 am for pete's sake! She made me come almost to a complete stop before I could get around her!